What Will People Think? (Loag kya kahengey!)


Of course! Everyday! Yeah?

Ever thought that this is the usual reason we DON’T do something?

And the things we don’t do because of THAT are close to our heart. Doing it would have made us happier, closer to our dream or passion, our destiny?
But alas, we let it go…. Just because? What will people say?

Sometimes we think so little about things that we should be thinking about more… and then sometimes:
We think TOO MUCH about stuff that should not even matter to us!

Regina Brett, 90 years old, couldn’t have said it any better:
‘What People Think of You is not your problem!’
For more of her life lessons:Interesting Thoughts By A 90-Year Old Gal

I’d like to know how one creates this fantastic reason (read illusion!) to shy away from the zenith of our personal and professional lives, our relationships, our family, in effect our very existence. For a moment, lets suppose that people DO say or think about us, most of.. no, ALL of that is bad, so?

But then, we live for people or for ourselves?

If you are doing something worth doing then rest assured there will be criticism, strong criticism…
Are we here for a popularity contest?

I now quote my favorite author, Tim Ferris, who wrote the bestseller ‘The 4-Hour Work Week’ (http://www.fourhourworkweek.com/ ):
He says in his blog:
” Scott Boras, widely regarded as the most powerful agent in professional baseball, describes a dinner with one of his mentors after a record-breaking contract:

“He said that if you are really effective at what you do, 
95% of the things said about you will be negative. 
Keep your head on straight, don’t get emotional, 
take the heat, 
and just make sure your clients are smiling.”

This doesn’t mean that we WANT to piss people off, but, if that is what happens while we do our stuff, then so be it!

Makes sense?

I know this is a tough one. But Eid holidays do THAT to me!

Comment in the box below, lets discuss what makes us behave this way and how to get out of this?
Share your experiences, if you feel like.

Keep shining…
Dare to Dream!

Have a great life!

Nuruddin Abjani

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  • Asma

    I feel that a point comes where you do worry about the opinions of the people who matter to you.. could be parents, or a lover.. may be to get their approval and company.

    When you want something really bad, you make efforts to get it. But again the question is, is it worth it? There is always a conflict between heart & mind.
    Dil becomes a little bacha sometimes 😉

    But on a serious note, if we talk about people in general, they really shouldn’t matter, people dont really run our homes, and we shouldn’t allow them to drive our lives for us. And i’ve also realized, that our values should be our driving force. The value system is the guide, and the most important one for me is Kindness, & giving love (still in process).


  • Amjad Evan

    But sometimes we are about to do something wrong and suddenly an inner voice tries to stop us by using the same argument “K Log kya kahain gay!” 🙂 I guess in this situation LOG KYA KAHAIN GAY Is a good excuse to avoid a bad action.

    So the message i got from this brilliant(as always) blog of yours is that we should not regard/wrongly-fit our  self-created excuses for something good and worthy.Cuz they kill our potential, They stop us before even trying something which is worthy….   🙂


    Amjad Awan

    • Thanks Amjad.

      Yes, what you said is another twist to the same phrase. 

      I had written another post called, “Who are you when no one’s watching.” Its somewhat written on the premise that you touched upon. 
      Check it out, I am sure you will find it interesting.

      Stay blessed. 


  • sagar sadam

    sir very nice, superb

  • hasnain ovais

    what a blog. love it

  • vivarouge

    I liked what you wrote Sir…and i agree that even i used to behave that way a few years ago…perhaps lack of self confidence and exposure with the real world led me to act like that..Life experiences teach you a lot….and i learnt that people will talk and criticize no matter what you do…But if you have faith in your self and your gut feeling tells you that you are right…then you need not worry about others opinion…I owe it to the experiences i had in my University for making me more sensible and a daring person.

  • Nuruddin Abjani

    Very well said: What I am and what I am not – in the eyes of the world – I never cared much…
    Its us who we must look at and up to…No one else!

  • Rozina Lalani

    Aur phir kisi ney kiya khoob kaha hey… kuch tau log kahange,logon ka kaam hey kehna…..

  • Rozina Lalani

    Nuru sure its not a contest,and it is true also that people often live on others opinion that log kiya kahangey!but in the end, what u think of yourself is more matter than what the world thinks.The approval i need most is from the person i see in the mirror.That is the person i work with, play with, eat with, sleep with and shall die with…. What he thinks of me is most important.If he doesn't approve, then the recognition and approbation of all others mean nothing.
    The greatest characters have always prize self-esteem above public opinion. Being able to look self in the eyes is better than the fickle notice of onlookers.What i am,what i am not,in the eyes of the world, is what i never cared for much.well said by Thomas szasz, People often say that this or that person has not yet found himself.But the self is not something that one finds.It is something that one creates.

  • Nuruddin Abjani

    Yes, makes sense, Dilshad. This is another dimension, to feel happy coz you are getting more attention…Nice thought.
    What if sometimes the family is also a hindrance?
    The immediate family is more concerned about people… then?

  • dilshad jivraj

    may be that is the reason behind my happiness, bec i really dont care,what others think about me, as long as my immeidiate family is ok about it. and even if somebody comes and tell me things what i did or what i didnt, it makes me more happy, bec they r giving more attention to me. so im the most imp person now (just kidding).